Self doubt the cancer within.
Blinding our eyes to what actually is.
We’ve been given gifts meant to share with others, to brighten the lives of our sisters and brothers.
I’ve quite often been considered a shy person with not much to say. It’s not that I didn’t have anything to say, I just didn’t know what to say or the confidence to say anything at all.
I was one of those people always comparing myself to others, Susan is so smart. Marion is so talented. Samuel is so witty. Mindy always knows exactly the right thing to say at the right time. This affliction of mine caused me a great deal of angst and when I did say something I’d put my foot in my mouth. Then I’d feel the need to have to pull it out the rest of the conversation.
Meditating on this torment I was putting myself through I was reading Jesus words in Mark 12:30-31 “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength. The second is this, You shall love your neighbour as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these.” Wow, I had to read that over again I could understand love the Lord your God, and your neighbour but love myself? That’s where I was all wrong. I was loving God and my neighbour alright but totally disregarding the fact that I needed to love myself. I needed to stop the comparison game and love the person God created me to be. Unique, with purpose and dignity. I have gifts to share and talents that must not be buried as the bible clearly talks about in the parables of the talents Jesus is talking about when He comes again. No-one knows the day or hour, only the Father. What will he find?
Matthew 25:14-29 talks about a man going on a journey and calls his servants and entrusts his property to them. To one he gives five talents and this man immediately goes to work and gains five more. To another he gives two talents and he gains two more. To another he gives one talent and this man buries his talent in the ground for he was afraid of the owner accusing him of being a hard man, harvesting where he had not sown and gathering where he had not scattered seed. When the man returned from his journey he was well pleased with his servants that gained more and had nothing but praise for them by saying “Well done good and faithful servant” to each of them. He also put them in charge of many things and said for them to share in their master’s happiness. When he approached the servant that was in charge of the one talent and listened to him the outcome was not good, he was called a “Wicked and lazy servant.” His talent was given to the one who had the most. He was actually thrown outside, into the darkness, where there was weeping and gnashing of teeth.
We have all been given gifts and talents, I have been a career woman my whole life and it has been brought to my attention how much I have been admired how I juggled my work life and family life seemingly effortlessly.
Where do you excel? As my time working as a health care worker, I worked with the elderly and I came across many that struggled with their purpose in their senior years. Many struggled with depression. I would encourage them that with age comes wisdom and this wisdom could be shared with their families, and perhaps their caretakers that came to work with them. For christian seniors I would encourage them to pray for their families and also their workers. An extremely high calling if you ask me.
Now I am in a new season of my life and waiting for the new adventure the Lord is leading me into. No more comparison game for me.
The Lord is good to all he has compassion on all he had made. Psalm 145:9
That’s a promise!